Curriculum For Your Degree in Becoming a Man (or Woman)
B.S. in BECOMING A REAL MAN
That's right, in just six semesters
they can become real men!
"REAL MAN CURRICULUM" (prepared and
presented by females)
FIRST YEAR
Fall Schedule:
MEN 101 Combating Stupidity
MEN 102 You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103 PMS-Learn When to Keep Your
Mouth Shut
MEN 104 We Do Not Want Sleazy Underthings
for Christmas
Winter Schedule:
MEN 110 Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111 Understanding the Female Response
to Getting in at 4a.m..
MEN 112 Parenting: It Doesn't End
with Conception
MEN 113 Get a Life, Learn to Cook
Spring Schedule:
MEN 120 How NOT to Act Like an Idiot
When You're Wrong
MEN 121 Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122 YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123 Reasons to Give Flowers
SECOND YEAR
Fall Schedule:
MEN 202 How to Put the Toilet Seat
Down I
MEN 203 How to Put the Toilet Seat
Down II
MEN 204 How to Put the Toilet Seat
Down III
MEN 205 How to Put the Toilet Seat
Down IV
Winter Schedule:
MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming
Your Dependency
MEN 211 How Not to Act Younger Than
Your Children
MEN 212 You, Too, Can Be a Designated
Driver
MEN 213 Honest-You Don't Look Like
Tom Cruise-Especially Naked
Spring Schedule:
MEN 320 Omitting @#%~&*! From
Your Vocabulary
MEN 321 Fluffing the Blanket After
Passing Gas is Not Necessary
MEN 322 Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 323 Thirty Minutes of Begging
is Not Considered Foreplay
B.S. in BECOMING A REAL WOMAN
"REAL WOMAN CURRICULUM" (prepared
and presented by males)
FIRST YEAR
Fall Schedule
WO 101. Are You Ready to Leave?: Definition
of the Word YES
WO 102. Inappropriate Rhetorical Questions
(as in, "Honey, Do I Look Fat?")
WO 103. Elementary Map Reading
WO 104. Crying and Law Enforcement
Winter Schedule
WO 106. You CAN Go Shopping for Less
than 4 Hours
WO 107. Gaining Five Pounds vs. The
End of the World: A Study in Contrast
WO 108. The Seven-outfit Week
WO 109. PMS: It's YOUR Problem, Not
Mine (Or, "It's Happened Monthly Since
Puberty: Deal with It")
Spring Schedule
WO 210. Driving I: Getting Past Automatic
Transmission
WO 211. Driving II: The Meaning of
Red Lights
WO 212. Driving III: Approximating
a Constant Speed
WO 213. Driving IV: Makeup and Driving:
It's As Simple as Oil and
Water
SECOND YEAR
Fall Schedule
WO 215. The Super Bowl: Not a Game,
A Sacrament
WO 216. Telephone Translations (formerly
titled "Me Too" = "I Love You")
WO 217. How to Earn Your Own Money
WO 218. Gift-giving Fundamentals (as
in, "Fabric Bad, Electronic Good")
Winter Schedule
WO 301. Putting the Seat Down By Yourself:
Potential Energy is on Your Side
WO 302. Know When to Say When: The
Limits of Makeup
WO 303. Beyond "Clean and Dirty":
The Nuances of Wearable Laundry
WO 304. We Forget Birthdays, You Forget
Sports Stats: LET'S LET IT DROP
WO 305. MYOB: Proper Response to Other
Couple's Public Arguments
Spring Schedule
WO 310. Yes, You Can Buy Condoms (formerly,
"It's too embarrassing")
WO 311. Joys of the Remote Control:
Reaping the Benefits of 50+ Channels
WO 312. What Goes Around Comes Around:
Why His Credit Card is Not a Toy
WO 313. Cleaning day does not always
have to be Saturday.
Courses for Extra Credit
WO 320. His Poker Games: Deal Yourself
Out
WO 321. Commitment Schmittment (formerly
titled "Wedlock Schmedlock")
WO 322. To Honor and Obey: Remembering
the Small Print Above "I Do"
WO 323. Why Your Mother Is Unwelcome
in the House
WO 324. Your Mate: Selfish Bastard,
or Victimized Sensitive Man?
Carolyn Brieger
Secretary to the Assistant Vice Chancellor
for Enrollment Management
The University of North Carolina at
Charlotte
Office of the Registrar
9201 University City Blvd.
Charlotte NC 28223-0001